Final Piano Recital 2017

     My final piano recital was March 25th, 2017 (also my daughter's 26th birthday) I have been a piano teacher for almost 35 years.  Last fall, I realized I had to quit teaching on the same evening that I realized I had to sell my home.  Quitting piano teaching was not simply quitting a job; It has been one of the most difficult decisions I have had to make, along with getting a divorce and selling my home. 

     Leaving my career has meant leaving long relationships, leaving something I have worked for all of my life, starting completely over and having no idea what I can or will do.  It was truly terrifying because this is something I do very well, so I know that something greater than me is at play.

     All of my students played with heart and soul during this recital.  They played with maturity and a sense of ownership I have never seen in my recitals before.  I was truly moved.  How could I leave students who performed the way they felt, who cried tears when we had to say goodbye, and who wrote such beautiful words of thanks in their cards and letters?  All I could tell them was that this moment has prepared me for what is to come.  I finally learned that to teach well and from the heart, one has to love, inspire, and accept.

 

     Now it is time for me to explore, listen, and create, but most of all, learn to feel from a deeply spiritual place and love myself.  I want to thank my Mother (who died 3 years ago on January 9th) for her guidance and constant companionship as a teacher, my Dad, who supported me no matter what,  for Eugenia O'Reilly, my pre-college teacher who taught me to look beyond the studio for inspiration, and my students of the last 35 years who have taught me so many things about myself (not always positive I might add) and who loved me when I was at my best and continued to love me at my worst.  I hope I did the same for most of them. I know I made mistakes along the way, but I am human and this is a wonderful journey of hills and valleys.  May there be many paths to come and may I embrace the ups and downs as I learn a new way of living.

Conquer the World

     I hesitate as I start writing this first entry because it is an incredibly surreal feeling for me that this journey is here.  Actually, it began about 2 or 3 years ago depending on which event I use to represent a starting point.  It is the journey from here on out that I will share with you in this blog,  at least for now. 
     I am leaving on Monday April 3rd with my Tacoma pickup, my 16 foot camper trailer, which I have called "Night Walker", and my dog, Teddy.  We are heading west to begin a trip which will begin my new life.  I have spent the last  year and a half dismantling my life of 30 years.  It was not of my own doing, I can tell you.  There has been a pull, no, an outright YANK, that I have had no choice but to follow.  This has been a year and a half of hell, but a sliver of light has helped keep me going forward most of the time, and if that was not there, some incredible friends and family members helped keep me sane and supported. 
     This is a time to find "me" and the life that I really must live to be an authentic person, but mostly,
it is a time to dig deep and be with God and listen to what the universe has in store for me.  Is the life I have led before this less important? No, it is something that I have had an incredibly difficult time leaving.  My life as a wife, a piano teacher, a mother (which I will gratefully always be), has been one that I cherish in my heart.   It was meant to be, exactly the way it was.  Now, something else is waiting, but I just don't know what.  All I know is that I need to be me, I need to open up to people and experiences, and I need to be open in my heart.  I hope that this blog will share these experiences with you.

 (Thank you Judy Simon, for doing the artwork for "Night Walker".  I love it!)